Foggy Memory
by TheHodgeOfPodge
Summary: After having a horrible nightmare about his past; Beast Boy seeks comfort in his close friend, the cloaked empath Raven. This is a one-shot that takes place after season 5 of the 2003 Teen Titans animated show. HUGE thanks to scathecraw for the proofreading and basically everyone in the BBRae Daily Discord for the support!


In the early morning, Jump City would very occasionally be enveloped by a swell of fog clouds, moving in from the sea towards the shore. Being situated on a small island offshore, Titans Tower was the first to feel the velvety dampness of the mist. This also included anyone exposed to the moistening air — in this case, the resident cloaked empath. Raven floated gently above the roof of the tower, unmoving from her signature lotus position, reciting her mantra near-silently. Her hood rested on her shoulders; the sun made the pale skin and chakra gemstone on her forehead, glisten. There was a comforting warmth in the morning air that persisted even when she was surrounded by a soft blanket of clouds.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos." Her gentle voice spoke. Those oh-so famous words, dissipating into the muffling softness of the mist that slowly enveloped her being. She was often awake at this time of the morning, greeting the sun as it broke the horizon at dawn each day. The same could not be said however, for the green young man slowly approaching her from behind. Despite his outlandish appearance, he remained unseen. The thickness of the fog would have prevented Raven from seeing him even if her eyes were open. Nothing however, could escape her perceptive empathic abilities, they could have sensed his unease from a dimension away. Beast Boy stood atop the roof, struggling to peer through the fluffy semi-transparency of the mist at the empath floating before him. He knew she was there, though. His keen sense of smell could identify her scent in a split-second. He stepped forward as quietly as possible so as not to disturb her concentration.

"I know you're there, Beast Boy…," Raven spoke with slight volume. Garfield stood in place for a second, her figure now much more visible through the sea of clouds. Raven's eyelids remained closed. "This fog can't hide your emotions from me." She stated, perfectly aware of her surroundings while unable to see. She could tell she was surrounded by mist, simply by how the thickness of the air gently muffled her mantra, a testament to how often she really was up here.

"I know." Beast Boy replied in a sombre manner. Confusion sparked in Raven at his response. "Then why were you trying to be so quiet?" she questioned.

"I didn't want to disturb your meditation. I know how important it is to you." He truthfully stated. Raven was slightly taken aback at his polite gesture then presumed the most logical explanation.

"I guess the fog doesn't muffle my voice as much as I thought it did." Raven joked, still facing out toward the sea, presuming he must've overheard her chanting.

"No." He gently responded, much to Raven's confusion again. Her brows furrowed from his responses.

"Hmm, I guess I'll have to ask Star for some nice smelling soap to help cover my scent then." She quipped once more, assuming he had used his nose instead.

"I didn't need to use any of my senses to know you were up here meditating, Raven. I know you." Garfield explained. Raven's eyebrows slowly raised, and her eyelids began to open. She unfolded her legs and her feet touched the top of the roof once more. She couldn't deny how humbled she felt at how familiar the changeling was with her everyday habits. His emotions told her he was telling the truth. He did know her, really damn well in fact. She turned to face him, struggling to see him through the fog. They both stood in place, knowing the other was looking right back at them despite how little they could see of each other.

" _Hmm. Let's see – up before noon, depressed feelings pouring off of him, and he hasn't made a cheesy joke in the last 5 minutes. Something's wrong."_ The empath thought, keeping her gaze locked on the blurred, green man before her.

"Can I talk to you about something?" The Changeling asked quietly.

"Uhh… sure."

The Demoness replied, trying to fight off a blush from him expressing his wholesome familiarity with her. Garfield approached Raven, gently stepping past her through the mist before sitting with his legs dangling over the side of the roof, looking out into a vast sea of white. Raven mimicked his actions.

"What is it you want to talk about?" she asked sincerely, knowing how vulnerable his emotions were right now.

"I've… been having trouble sleeping," he explained, looking down at his feet with a solemn look on his face. His mouth was a flat, tight line. Not a smile nor a frown, his lips were static, the monotony only being pierced by his one exposed fang. Raven was caught in a metaphysical juxtaposition; she was simultaneously being smothered by soft, welcoming fog clouds and harsh feelings of depression, radiating from the usually chipper changeling seated next to her. While she usually seemed to give the impression that she enjoyed seeing him in pain, the truth was she hated seeing him like this. He put so much effort into making others feel happy and experience joy…even if it was sometimes at his expense. It was so upsetting to see someone who put others' feelings ahead of his own seem so down. Even now, despite feeling such strong, negative emotions, he was still thoughtful enough not to disturb her meditation. This gesture had most certainly not gone unnoticed by the empath.

"Oh. Do you know what might be the cause?" Raven asked curiously, genuinely concerned for her friend's wellbeing.

"Well… I keep having this nightmare…" he explained with a hint of reluctancy. "…and I can't seem to stop thinking about it no matter how hard I try." Garfield raised his head, looking out, musing on how much their foggy surroundings mirrored the turmoil in his head.

Raven looked on, taking in every word. "Well, what happens in this nightmare? Whatever it is, it must be pretty bad if it's affecting _you_ of all people this much." Raven commented, recalling his joyous attitude towards life and the people around him.

Garfield cracked a small smile coupled with a slight, reddening blush to his otherwise green complexion. He wouldn't dare deny; she knew him pretty damn well, too. Quite possibly more than anyone else, in fact.

"Well basically… I keep finding myself in the middle of this grassland, but there's no animals in sight. It's so weird though, 'cause I dream about animals almost all the time! There are trees in the distance, and the grass is long and a kinda yellow colour…" The green hero explained, clearly trying to avoid the main focus of the dream. Raven remained patient with him, however. She was no stranger to having difficulty expressing her emotions, so she sympathised with her teammate's current struggle. "… and then… out of nowhere… this mirror just appears!" He exclaimed, whilst gesturing with his hands as though what he was talking about was actually in front of them.

"A mirror?" The empath queried. Perhaps this was related to his and Cyborg's unintentional visit to Nevermore a few years ago. She hoped not as she could not deny the slight guilt she felt if this was the case. Perhaps there was some hidden trauma deep within Garfield's psyche since that day that she just hadn't sensed. Raven felt creeping dread, struggling to convince herself otherwise and beginning to doubt the quality of her empathic abilities.

"It looked nothing like your mirror, just in case you were worried about that." Garfield clarified.

"Umm… ok." Raven responded in an aloof manner, hiding her true feelings of relief behind an indifferent expression. The fact he had also considered this as well, showed her how much he cared for her feelings. Raven blushed, inwardly. "Did you see anything in the mirror?" she asked, suspecting that something he saw must be the root of his current depressed feelings. Beast Boy fell silent for a moment with a look of pain painted on his face. He looked down at the rocky outcrops being lashed by the waves below, jutting into the soft blanket of grey-white cloud above, now completely surrounding Titans Tower.

"When I looked into the mirror… I saw…" he paused. Raven now drowning in his feelings of deeply-rooted sadness and conflict. This was coupled with her own feelings of apprehension, now desperate to know what he had seen in his slumber, for both of their sakes. She placed her hand on top of his.

"Gar…it's ok. You can tell me." She reassured him with the gentlest of tones. This sweet gesture almost brought a tear to his eye as he looked deep into the empath's amethyst irises. Garfield knew she was telling the truth. She always told him the truth.

"I know." He responded, confidently. "When I looked into the mirror… I saw… this kid…" He explained, now looking down again, glum.

"Kid?" Raven echoed in an inquisitive manner.

"Yeah. A little blond boy." Gar stated bluntly.

"Did you know them?" Raven asked, despite already having a pretty good idea as to what his answer would be.

"You could say that…" he alluded, with an unhappy smirk gracing his features. Raven said nothing. She had an unbreaking gaze on his emerald green eyes, she already knew what was coming.

"It was me. Ya know, before…" he trailed off, knowing Raven had already guessed, just from looking into her beautiful eyes. The empath moved her hand so that their fingers interlocked. She tightened her grip ever so slightly to ensure him she was here for him. "I know this is gonna sound weird but… I actually don't remember what I used to look like. But I knew it was me." Garfield admitted. Raven was speechless. She knew he wasn't always green, but she had never given his previous appearance as much thought as she had now. He had been this way for so long that his old, 'normal' appearance was now becoming a distant memory to him, to the point where he could no longer remember what he looked like before. She gripped his hand tighter, with sadness in her eyes.

"I couldn't help but think… how things could have been if…" he trailed off once more, fighting back tears.

"Gar…" Raven could barely form words. It was eating away at her, seeing someone so close to her in such distress. The blanket of clouds surrounding them provided no comfort.

"I lost it!" Gar exclaimed abruptly. "I didn't want to think about it! I didn't want to see it! I punched the mirror and it smashed to pieces." His face scrunched up as all his emotions began to seep out all at once. "And then everything went black. I know there's more but… I just can't remember it… it's all a blur." Beast Boy's voice began to break up and his eyes stained red as tears began to stream down his cheeks. Raven let him get it all out. Beast Boy was always so chilled-out and laid-back, and she knew he needed this chance to vent.

"Garfield… I… I'm so sorry." She comforted. No animal instincts were required to tell him how genuine she was. Suddenly, an idea popped into the demoness' head. "There is… a way I could help you remember…" Raven trailed off. "It might help you deal with what you're going through. It just depends on one thing… Do you trust me?" she asked, looking hopeful and expectant at her green contemporary. Garfield turned towards her and reached out his arm, placing it gently on her shoulder.

"Raven, I trust you with my life." Garfield stated truthfully. They both looked into each other's' eyes, Raven's cheeks blared crimson and Gar's lips showed a much-missed smile. She struggled to find words and attempted to disguise her infatuation with his statement, by falsely clearing her throat.

"I could enter your mind and see what else is hidden in your dream." Raven explained.

"Dude, are you sure you wanna see that? For all we know there isn't anything else going on up there and you could get stuck in my brain!" Beast Boy stressed, pointing both hands towards his cranium in a panicked manner.

"Garfield I know what I'm doing. I don't need to see anything else. And if you let me in, I promise not to look any deeper." She clarified, now placing her hand on his back.

"I know you do, and… I know you wouldn't. It's just… what if there's a ton of nasty stuff waiting in my mind for you? I'm not sure I could risk putting you through that. I'd never forgive myself if something horrible happened to you!" The changeling stressed.

Raven, touched by his concern for her wellbeing. "Well, I'll never forgive myself if I do nothing and have to watch you deal with this all alone!" Raven retaliated. "Besides, you're not the only who has to feel all of your sad emotions..." she reminded him.

Garfield's brow furrowed as he looked down at the roof below them, slightly peeved with himself for forgetting how much his emotions could negatively affect her too. He settled on a decision, then looked up at her with confidence.

"Ok… do it. And hey, if it worked with Robin, then why not me?" He said. "And Raven…" She looked into his eyes as he spoke. "Thank you." While Raven was touched by his sentiment, the gratitude was premature.

"Don't thank me yet, Gar." She proclaimed, placing her hands on her temples and gently closing her eyelids. Beast Boy relaxed his body and mind, gently closing his eyes.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos…" Raven spoke quietly, her eyes glowing white and her soul self floating up into the shrouding sea of clouds, before diving down into Garfield's psyche. When Raven opened her eyes, it looked almost no different to the view she was seeing a few moments ago, just without a green changeling in view. There were many clouds surrounding her, except these were dark grey in colour. "This is definitely the right place!" she proclaimed to herself. She had managed to manifest herself into Garfield's place in his own dream. As the clouds parted, she found herself in the middle of a grassland, with many trees in the distance and long yellow grass at her feet. There was no mirror though, but instead the shattered fragments that once formed a mirror, lay strewn in the grass with an empty frame standing tall between the shards. In the reflection of one of the fragments, she saw lightning strike behind her, followed by a crash of thunder. Suddenly, different sounds assaulted her ear drums from every direction. Somewhere she could hear an animal squealing angrily. She recognised the call from Beast Boy's habit of transforming into them: a monkey. The sound of violently running water began booming all around her with unbearable volume, interjected with haunting screams. Raven placed her hands over her ears in a futile attempt to nullify this shrieking pain collapsing to her knees in the process, clenching her teeth and forcing her eyes shut. When the mortifying noises finally stopped, there was an eerie silence. When the empath opened her eyes, she was looking directly at the ground in front of her. She saw there was only one shard of the mirror left, and it bore an all too familiar face: the orange and black mask of Slade. Stumbling back slightly, Raven slowly removed her hands from her ears knowing he was once again more than just a nightmare in the physical world since the defeat of Trigon. Gone were the horrifying booming and shrieking sounds from before, now there was the exact opposite: near-silent whispers.

"She doesn't want to see you, anymore. She doesn't want to see you, anymore. She doesn't want to see you anymore." The menace in his voice was a painful memory for any member of the Titans. While she hadn't been present for this, she instantly knew who the masked man was referring to. Raven had seen all she'd needed to see, not to mention, hear. Her soul self took off into the horizon, appearing to become one with the dark clouds above, before soaring through them and leaving the expanses of Garfield's mind. Emerging from the changeling's psyche, a dark bird made of pure magical energy broke through the sea of foggy clouds surrounding the two teammates. Her soul self re-entered her body and her eyes began to dim from their shining white, returning to their normal amethyst state. Garfield opened his eyes, looking like he had never been happier to see Raven in his life, and that was saying a lot! Raven looked over at his tear-ridden face. They exchanged a look of understanding for only a second, before she pulled him in for a much-needed hug. Garfield was so overwhelmed with emotion, it took him several long seconds before he could even reciprocate.

"So uhh… I hope you didn't see anything too embarrassing in there, haha." Beast Boy chuckled through the tears, muffled by his face being nestled into Raven's shoulder.

"Garfield…I'm so sorry." The empath consoled. "I'm sorry for all the horrible things that have happened to you: The accident that gave you your powers, Terra, even me at times… You are such a kind and gentle soul, and you didn't deserve any of it." Raven explained, calming and mollifying the teary changeling.

"Raven…" Garfield didn't know what to say. What she had said had struck a chord with him. He knew that what she'd said had come from the heart. "Thank you… so much." Tears of sadness had slowly turned to tears of joy and love. A void deep within his heart felt as if was being filled again. Much to his dismay, she removed her arms from him, giving him some room to breathe and catch his breath after crying.

"A lot of it still seems… well, foggy to me though, heheh." Garfield explained with a distinct lack of confidence and a breathy laugh coinciding with his corny joke. "Like, I'm still not exactly sure what I looked like back then…maybe it wasn't even me and I was wrong? I dunno…" he trailed off. Raven didn't speak, but had a laser focus on his expression. "Oh well… I'm Beast Boy now, so I guess it doesn't really matter that much, right?"he asked rhetorically, but Raven interjected.

"No." She stated sternly. Garfield looked confused by both her statement and the tone in which she spoke it in. "That was you." Garfield was still in the dark. "I didn't see it, because that's not how I see you. That kid you saw was you, but you weren't sure because that's not how you see yourself. You see yourself as Beast Boy, but that's not who you are." The green teenager looked on with wide eyes. "No matter what happens, no matter how much you change… you are and always will be Garfield Logan. Nothing anything or anyone ever does will change who you are." Raven spoke with dead-seriousness in her voice.

Garfield could barely even comprehend what had just occurred. He was at an utter loss for words. "Raven, I… I don't know what to say…" he said in a quiet tone.

"You don't need to say anything." She cut him off. Raven stood up and began to walk away after dropping such a verbal and emotional bomb on her teammate.

"Raven… wait!" Garfield called, urgency in his voice but a calm demeanour. She froze in place after hearing her name uttered in such a way. She had made it halfway across the roof before Garfield caught up to her. He reached out his arm, and gently gripped her hand in his, prompting her to turn around. When she rotated on her heel, she saw a beautiful pair of emerald irises looking deep into her heart and soul, but only for a second. The next thing she knew, his lips were upon hers. She didn't fight him, and she didn't want to. In fact, she couldn't help but let her eyelids drop, euphoric at the sensation of his touch. It just felt… right. The kiss was simple. No tongue, no moans, chaste and heartfelt to its core. The tears still adhering to his cheeks began to mark hers too. Gar's eyes were closed, and he felt like the luckiest man in the world right now, because in his mind, he was. He knew there was no one else like her, and he was so lucky to even know her and now here he was, kissing the empathic demoness like the invaluable treasure she truly was to him. When their lips finally parted, no words were spoken. The silence spoke for itself. When they opened their eyes, there wasn't a cloud in sight.


End file.
